“Yeah… research. Totally.”

August 7, 2008

A conversation I have been having a lot recently is about KINDS OF RESEARCH I WOULD LIKE TO DO WHEN I AM FABULOUS. And not, “going to the library” research, or research for specific projects, but the kind where you casually call the FBI and mention that you’re a screenwriter and can you please go shadow your local Special Agent for a few days and instead of going “Get off the phone, you weirdo! We need to keep this line open for bomb threats.” they say “Oh, cool. How’s Tuesday?”

(It’s my fantasy! Stop frowning and going THAT’S NOT WHAT WOULD HAPPEN ELANA.)

Here are things I want to do (some of Naomi’s items – plus a story of how a woman at her office went into labor in a disappointingly low-key way – are here) when I become fabulous, etc.:

*Visit Antarctica

*Visit Iraq (I recently googled “how to visit Iraq” and there were NO HITS. Doesn’t that seem unlikely? Surely I can’t be the only person who’s curious about these things.)

*Visit one of those courses where cops or FBI people or special forces types (I AM NOT PICKY) learn COMBAT DRIVING

*Go on ridealongs. With Naomi. (As in, “Naomi and I would like to go on ridealongs at the same time”, not “I wish to ride around in the back of Naomi’s car”. I like Naomi a lot, but there’s a limited amount of entertainment there.)

*Visit an aircraft carrier (AT SEA, please.)

*Do you think they’ll let me visit DARPA? Probably not. Sigh. But if they do, I would like to go! I am very discreet.

*Visit some kind of otter-centered facility.

SO. That’s just a starter list. I’m sure it will get longer and more ridiculous as I get closer and closer to the event horizon of fabulousness.


2 Responses to ““Yeah… research. Totally.””

  1. Annie Says:

    I once visited an otter-centered facility that had been (temporarily, I think) associated with the Monterey Bay Aquarium.

    Oh. My. God. It was like a cute bomb went off and there was cute carnage everywhere.

  2. Jenny Says:

    You’re right (about so many things) When one googles ‘visit iraq’ you get the link “reasons NOT to visit iraq” Hmm

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