Lover. Fighter. Muse.

September 21, 2008

I just saw this totally amazing bio on Facebook:

Professional Actress in Hollywood. Local celebrity – soon to be known worldwide! Former US Naval Officer. Writer/Poet. Athlete. Adventurer. Philosopher. Lover. Fighter. Muse. Role Model. Any questions?

Yeah, I have a question: what kind of personality do you have to have before it seems normal and acceptable instead of TOTALLY HILARIOUS to do your bio like that?

My uncle was just mildly complaining to me that my blog is false advertising, because he sends it to people and they’re all “…um, is this going to be about lesbian porn?” and then it’s like SURPRISE SUCKA! WHOLESOME DOG STORIES!

Something similar just happened to me. Google Reader recommended a blog called BLUE SKY and I naturally thought “OOOH I BET IT’S LIKE A SECRET DARPA BLOG WHERE SOME SCIENTIST TALKS ABOUT HOW HE’S TRYING TO WEAPONIZE PENGUINS THIS IS GONNA BE SO AWESOME.” and instead it was about something really boring like gluten-free baking. So very disappointing. 😦

PS, sometimes people looking for, erm, Mormon pornography (?!?!?!?!?) end up here. Man, they must be EXTRA disappointed. Plus I have a really difficult time imagining what Mormon pornography entails. “Here I am… in my loose-fitting and totally modest Secret Mormon Garment… Running my fingertips along my religiously-mandated store of 50-pound cans of wheat… Sexily being dunked in a pool for a round of proxy baptisms… doing HOT GENEALOGY RESEARCH!”

Listening to: Girls Who Play Guitars – Maximo Park


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